15 December 2005
In the midst of such craziness, I went for this superbly interesting, marvelous, Christ powered, miracle filled Youth camp of mine, met people from other parts of the world, I turned down invitations to free lunch, dinner and movie, I will be working throughout the weekend to finish my work, I am going to shift into a new house by Sunday, I might not be able to present my work nicely, I might just scarpe through my remaining week of holiday before the new term starts on the 2 of January 2006.
Now, is that not interesting? Would I be able to finish all my work on time? Would a comet, meteorite, car, stone crash land and burn my homework? Would a super chun and helpful person come and offer to do all my homework? Would I be able to safe Jackhsiung's Christmas? Would I cry for the first time in so many years for not being able to finish my homework? Stay tune for next post...
p.s. Thanks for those who have been praying for me. :)
24 November 2005
I am surprised that I could go so long not reading and writing blogs. Man, I miss all those funny posts by all those funny people. Here, is a little update in point form for people who are busy like me:
- It is deadline season: all homework and assignments are due within a short period of time. My course is coming to an end, in 4 weeks time.
- No credit: my handphone has had no credit since it recovered from its fall a few weeks back.
- Youth camp is coming: yeah.. one which I might not be going to enjoy. I might not have the time to! blewk..
- Moving to a new road - slowly: so slowly that people actually notice the progress in movement.
- Missing people: yeah, I miss proper human interaction quite a lot.
- Hungry: I eat the same thing each day even guys notice
- Hunger: My spirit man is.
- Homecoming: Many of my friends are coming back from abroad and I succesfully managed to mix all their dates. Brilliant eh?
09 November 2005
Arriving late at the wake about 10 minutes late, we were led to our seats at the back corner. Booklets with songs of praise and worship were passed to us and we sang accordingly.
The difference this time was I was fighting back emotions of sadness. Although tears were coming, but it felt rather difficult to cry it out. When the singing ended, we sat down and listened to the testimonies of the Youth leader who prepared the girl for her final few days unknowingly.
The Youth leader "walked" with the girl from the moment she entered the hospital until the last day she left this world. The Youth leader played a vital role in keeping a spiritual well being of the family through prayers. At one point, she had a vision that God said it was time to call the girl home. After struggling for a long while, the Youth leader told the family about the vision and they too accepted it. The girl's last request was to hear or see the eldest brother who was studying abroad. When her brother called her before he boarded the plane, they spoke for an hour. As soon as the conversation ended, she was gone within minutes.
The eldest brother's testimony was just as powerful. At the beginning of this incident a few weeks back, he felt heavy hearted and the need of calling back. The family at that moment, decided not to break the news of the sister's condition for the fear of extra pressure on his studies. As days when by, again and again he felt sadness of which he could not explain. When the brother got news of his ailing sister, together with his some of his Christian friends they prayed. When the call came to get the brother to go back immediately, he missed the flight by an hour. The next available flight was the noon the next day. Going back to the hotel to get some rest, the brother got a phone call at 4 in the morning to talk to the sister. They talked for an hour or so and he went back to sleep.
The next day, the same cab driver brought him back to the airport just when the brother needed it so much. When he finally reached back here, the Youth leader went to pick him up. Sensing that the brother figured out that the sister has gone, the Youth leader prepared him by informing him the kind of visual to expect when he reaches home. The brother joined his family in a somewhat calm and collective manner.
I am not sure if the I relate the story correctly or wholely, but if you could see that God was in everything, every part of this from the very beginning. No, we still do not have an answer as to why He decided to take the girl away from us but the tremendous effects and blessings on the lifes of many are simply amazing. It brought into realisation to many that life is indeed precious and it could be taken away just in the blink of an eye. Many people who knew her said they missed her so much.
But one vision was repeated each time when someone related it was that Jesus was with her through her pain and suffering. This girl is one tough cookie when she went through her chemotherapy sessions. The effects are painful as her doctor dad explained. However, the girl went through it without so much of a complain. A few mentioned a vision that Jesus was carrying her all the time.
One pastor from the Puchong church was approached while speaking as a guest in another church with a verse from Marks of Jesus telling a woman that she is completely healed (could not remember the verse).
Another remarkable thing about is that Senior Pastor mentioned that parents stayed on each day without fail with the girl. That means nearly 17 days in total. Not a part of a day, not half a day, but the whole day. Each parents taking turns in taking care of her, and always by her side.
It holds true. In the end, the girl is the victor in Christ. She is fully healed now in her new body in heaven. Some of the family members have accepeted this and are rejoicing now (especially the father and elder brother) knowing this fact by hard.
And I thought I was strong. The moment before we left, we went over to the coffin. As I approached it, a strong fear overwhelmed me and I dare not look into the covers until an aunt I was familiar with held me and together we looked in.
Until now, I am still overwhelmed and saddened. But I rejoice, with many others, knowing that she is safe now we Jesus, free from all suffering! Consider how a stranger has affected someone like me, what more if it is someone we know.
Here are two people who posted a journal on this, one is someone who is like me who kind of knew her; the other is her friend.
08 November 2005
The first person is a 15 year old girl from a sister church who has been treated with lukemia for the past 2 weeks. Although we (people from our church) barely knew her, we were all asked to pray for her health as it was deteriorating. Some even took the challenge to pray round the clock by taking an hour each.
Her condition did not improve and as of the 1055hour, 7th October 2005, she has gone home. What would be good to know was that the family, friends and relatives stayed and prayed with her until the very moment she left.
The second person is 18 year old girl who passed away of suspected pnuemonia on Sunday Star. What really caught my eye at first was the name. At first glance, I thought I have lost a good friend. Fearing the worst, I read on. Only to find out it was someone else with the same name and a distantly similar profile.
Although it was a relieve, my heart was still shaken by the fact that life could be so fragile.
There are a few things I got from these two misfortunes.
- Life is fragile.
- Lives can just come and go easily. It is worst when it is someone you can more or less relate to. I would not say that I could fully relate to the things they have been through. But it affected me and it got me thinking about what I really want to do in life with people I know with before it is too late.
- What kind of life do I want to live and legacy to leave behind? One left this place after touching the lifes of so many while the other has so much potential. What do I have? Does being nice and helpful actually mean anything? I am not talking so much as about being proud of what I have done. But have I done enough? Did I do it correctly so that it affected positively on others?
- What does God say in the end when we finally meet. Would I be in a big surprise when together we sit down to review my life only to find out that I could have done better, or I have been doing things wrongly? How much of Jesus is factored in my life? Have I been so ignorant so much so often?
- What should the next few steps be? I have all the time my God is willing to bless me with. And I really need Him to guide me. My best wish would be to really see His ways clearly so that I could serve Him better.
To their immediate family, my deepest condolenses for your lost. May God bless your heart.
The third death, maybe we will keep it for some other day.
02 November 2005
Since the first day I met my pastor, I knew he was cool, has the right heart and the passion for God. Pastor joined the church on the second week in joined the church. Joining the Youth Ministry at first, he easy going attitude sure got the youths of our church feeling comfartable with him around.
After a year later (if I got my facts correctly), pastor became the an associate pastor, leading our church into a new era or phase. Becoming our pastor for our congregation is not easy, especially when we were a bunch of crazy and somewhat slow moving people. A quick study of our church at that time would reveal we were in a bad state with many people hurt by the past.
But, one thing you really like about this pastor is that he is persistant. Through all the lousy things that we gave (well, not all the time), pastor would still do his best in bringing the best out of us.
Recently, there was a revival in church back in April this year (2005) and many people felt the need to change. These people have been touched by the Holy Spirit in ways even I would not be able to explain clearly although I have been through it. And pastor, is one of the main people used by God in this movement.
So now, you can see a radical change in my pastor. He is more daring now. So bold but so humble at the same time. He makes a stand on what he believes and nothing seems to be able to compromise that. However, that did not make him un-approachable. He is always available to the people in need of help, usually going the extra mile to make sure things are OK. If you can see it clearly, God is working in our church through pastor.
On Sunday, we finally have a chance to really appreciate everything our pastor did by hosting an appreciation dinner for all the pastors in our church.
Like the touch of God, dinner was good, icebreaker was amazing, the skit was funny and the worship session, simply spectacular.
Overall, I think pastor and his wife had a good time. So did the rest of the pastors and people. My highest regards and salute, to the Pastor who has it all from God! It is an honour to know him and be blessed in such amazing ways!
01 November 2005
I grew up in a world where handphone was not an issue until I entered first year of college. Everyone had one. Everyone was within reach. I was not. I was hard to get (anyway you want to see it). I was in a social blackhole that anyone with a phone could not reach me.
I am glad the way I am but not my friends. They wanted me to join the club badly. Everday they preach to me. Everyday they try their best to convert me. So finally, I gave in and after many months of saving, a handphone fell from the sky.
What I have is a Nokia3310. Lovely 5 year old technology when I first got it 2 years back. Not as colourful as most would imagine, but functional. The best thing is it makes phone calls and send messagers! To compliment it, a Digi prepaid starter pack worth RM20 at that time with the lowest call rates and sms too (now even cheaper with call rates being higher but sms is still dirt cheap unless you send it to other telcos).
Since then, the phone is with me everyday for all functions and events. It is one of the first thing I see when I wakeup (to hit the snooze button) and last thing I see before bedtime (set alarm) other than my Bible. It reminds me of birthdays and appointments, becomes my calculator, a tool for communicating and for protection. It is so rugged that you can drop it a few hundred times a year but it won't show you an error screen.
Or that was what I thought.
On the 372nd time I dropped the phone (two weeks back), the phone showed sign of defiance. It showed "low battery". Hmmm... pretty common. Seen it this before. So I charged the phone.
After the whole night later, it still did the same thing each time I turned on. It would not last more than 7.4 seconds before it shuts down with a "low battery" sign.
Finally, I have to declare my phone dead. OK, I would not say that my social life is dead. It has been dead for a long time now. By dropping the phone the 423rd time just made the living world harder to contact the dead.
All my living contact numbers are stored within a silly chip in the phone and the only way to retrieve any data is to have the phone stay switched on for at least 92 seconds.
To fix this tiny whinny little problem, I will need a miracle like getting a new phone (less likely) or replacing a battery (quite likely but not so soon) or remain out of reach for a long time.
Well, no frets. It is not the end of the world, there is always something called house phone, or the internet or snail-mail or signal through smoke and pegions and telepathy an...
30 October 2005
It is not a balance diet. And some of my nutritionists friends would scream in horrow over my bad selection. It is oily, filled with carbon from the frying wok, high in calories, low in vitamin C, tasteless, has green peas and chicken drumstick is so skinny.
I love a good meal with all the necessary nutrient at the right time, but it seems like a twisted fate that I have to eat an imbalance diet for the past few weeks or so and eating at the wrong time.
Of course, I get to eat whenever I want, except for dinner which I have to eat with my family. It is just that sometimes when you are caught up with work, or you totally missed the breadman van or your class starts at the wrong time with no hope of getting a break in between.
When you finally overcome all the big obstacles, the first thing you want to do is eat anything that is being served no matter how many odd colours there are in the dish you have ordered. Same applied for what happened today, but not as bad.
For preventive measure, say a prayer and thank God for the food, get Him to sanctify the food or risk having a tummy ache with indigestion or something along that line. OK, that happened not too long ago, I was being adventurous.
So, here you are. If you are interested in the meaning of eating and its significance, read this. It is actually quite interesting.
Till then, chow!
p.s. This post was inspired by both her and the stomach.
23 October 2005
I got a wakeup call when someone commented about my post yesterday. And another even stronger wakeup call after watching a play about Christians' marriage to the Church.
I think, as someone who yearns to hear from God and be taught of His ways each day, it is my duty not to turn down people who are in need of help even if it means listening to their problems all the time.
But what is duty with bad attitude? Hmm.. through the message I got from the play was that it is equivalent to not caring at all.
So, from today onwards, I pray that this new attitude of listening will stay for eternity. God was willing to listen to me, so should I be willing to listen.
22 October 2005
Do take note that I am not here to insult or make fun of anyone. I just want to point out sometimes I feel so helpless when talking to these people. I just do not know what to say because I would not be able to help them in anyway (to even feel better).
I have several friends who always seem to get into trouble with the world or things just doesn't seem to be lovely. They do complain about things that everyone face. And they do it very well.
Some would not complain, but would put up messages or signs about how their heart is slowly breaking, or are crying painfully when they sleep because they feel lonely. Some would beat themselves up by saying "I feel so useless" and so forth.
When you are ask them what happened, they will tell you that it is a small thing. These are people who always complain to you about things they are not happy or dissatisfied about.
I bet some are a little confused about what I am trying to say here. The truth is, so am I!
Yes, I have problems myself. Yes, we need to be aware of the problems we are facing so we could deal with it. No, we should not dwell on every single problem in our life every single minute that we are aware of it. And no, we should not use our colourful vocabulary to describe all our problems too.
The truth is, there is more to life than our very imperfection. If we look at how life sucks, then it is really overwhelming. Friends can only do so much as to offer their ears to listen. But be warn that even the best ears can go deaf if used to often.
Think! Think of ways you can overcome your problem, even if it means crawling back to God or humbling yourself. Your constant tearing can only make fungus grow on people's shirt, which brings more trouble in the end.
OK, OK. To summarise, read the two paragraphs before these. This does not mean that I do not want to listen to you if you have problems. I am willing to lend an ear and a hand if applicable. But don't cry and make it sound like it is the end of the world. The world does not need another catastrophe.
20 October 2005
But this term, I have a theory subject. And it is a heavy one. I have to learn how much soil much I have before I can plant my floor nicely. How deep my column must be or it would swing with the wind... you get the drift. My first paper in a very long time is finally coming and it is tomorrow.
Now, that is not the nightmare I am talking about. My test is an open book test.
The real nightmare I had has Walt in it. Nope, he is not the scary one.
Knowing the kind of person I am, I have decided to study at least two days before it. And all seem well. Suddenly, Walt appeared and asked me like what good friends would always ask: how much have you studied?
Me: Just started, why?
Walt: What? Still got two more days and you just started? I took 10 days just to glance through it!
Me: ... I don't want to fail!! NOoooOOoOOo......
And I woke up drenched in sweat. OK, that was a scene in a movie I want to watch. But it was still horrible! The fact that I would fail really scare me.
But as my breathing calmed down, I realised that Walt is studying engineering while I am doing an easier course than him. Why shoul I worry for something that engineers specialise in and architects just laugh at?
Anyway, I better get some real work done. Otherwise the my nightmare would become real.
All the best to all SPM, STPM, Nutritionists, Engineers, Marketing and Sales, Doctors, Mass Commist, Psychologists, Char Kwey Teoh fryer and anyone else in between... who will be taking a paper soon. God bless you all!
p.s. All those not taking test, also be blessed too!
According to a friend who used to play squash with her, Nicol runs around the court faster than you can blink properlly. Sigh, that is the only connection I have with her... *looks admiringly
Picture by Alan Tan from Lensapix
The other one, who did not do well, but still a chick, I mean a good sportswoman is Michelle Wie from America. The other reason why she deserves a mention here is because she is just turned 16 last week (?) and she is now playing Pro-Golf. Plus, she is Asian.
At this tender age, she is almost a millionaire and a 6 footer! Don't get me wrong when I said she did not do well. Or else she would not have played Pro. She just made an innocent mistake which made her look bad in her otherwise 4th place finishing in her pro debut.
Picture by REUTERS
Sharks.. I just spent so much time blogging on people I do not know, or least likely going to meet in real person. Back to reality it is for me. *with satisfactory smile :)
13 October 2005
This week, I introduced my blog to my friend. After a while, she mentioned that it is good to have a reason or a purpose for this blog. That got me thinking a little, have I for the past few thousand entries have been true to the purpose of this blog?
This blog's original purpose was to inspire, to bring humour and to enlighten readers about how a Christian brother is living life (of which the first two I do not know how to do). If I did hold fast to the original purpose, did I do it properlly or half heartedly? And how did the readers respond to the entries?
Yes, it seems like I would need to hire a marketing analyst for my blog. But I am not going to do that. I need to spend my time worrying about other things like my thining hair and my pillow. I always seem to get it locked in my parents room at night (another long story).
No amount of worrying would solve problems. I guess I would seriously need to evaluate all my future entries. I will try to make as much sense as possible in future, promise!
At the moment, there are several things I really need:
- A construction site where I can go take pictures of building structures.
- A book on Traditional Korean Architecture - there are none even in the Korean Embassy! blewh..
- More quality quiet time
- A long, long holiday with one or two person
- To bless some people who have been very nice to me by offering me rides and printer and teaching me and guiding me and...
11 October 2005
Like the other day in April when I drove to Cherating with several of my church mates for our Church camp with bad tires and invisible road tax for the car. We did not get into trouble with the wet weather and the local authorities (police, which happened to set a road block about 250m from our camp site). We could have gotten into lots of trouble no doubt, but God's grace is there.
Now, there is another story to it. It may not as dramatic as the former, but still as amazing as God itself. While we drove to Cameron Highland for the weekend, the engine of the truck we drove just died after turning right at the traffic light from the toll in Simpang Pulai.
Guessing it was just the alternator problem that caused the battery to run flat, my dad contacted the truck's manufacturer to get a local mechanic to replace the battery. However, even the replacement did not solve the problem. But an ingenious trick got the truck to start up again.
Otherwise, we would be stuck in Simpang Pulai (about 10km south of Ipoh) and our weekend trip would be cancelled.
All things were as normal until we arrived home on Sunday evening. That is when the truck finally gave up for good.
How can this be explained? Hmm.. not very well. But even if it is a mechanical problem, God's grace must have been there. If it wasn't for Him, we would have been a new resident of Simpang Pulai roadside or Cameron Highland.
And all of these because of a simple prayer made before the trip.
- Places been through: Subang - Simpang Pulai - Berinchang - Tanah Rata - Beringchang - Simpang Pulai - Shah Alam - Subang
- No. of times truck failed to start: 2
- No. of car battery changed: 1
- No. of stops along Simpang Pulai and Berinchang: at least 3 to take pictures
- No. of future landslide sites passed by: A lot
- Name of hotel stayed: Equatorial, Berinchang
- Cost of apartment suit after subsidies: RM80
- No. of rooms in apartment suit: 2
- No. of free drinks while waiting for room to be ready way after check in time: 4
- No. of breakfast coupons for occupants: None! none!! NONE!!
- Cost of meal for one day in Cameron Highland for four: RM127
- No. of years dad has been working on a case in Cameron Highland: 12 years
- Age of writter: 20 years
- No. of times it rain while being in Cameron Highland: 3 times
- Distant driven by writer on the way down from Cameron Highland to Simpang Pulai: at least 70km
- No. of cars writer overtook on the winding road: 2
- No. of 2 tonne trucks which overtook driver while doing 70km on winding road: 1
- No. of accident seen on the trip: 1
- No. of tow-truck seen: 5
Oh, a few more stats.
- No. of pics taken throughout the whole trip: 125.
- Location of people missed in the trip: Australia, Phillipines, Singapore and Subang Jaya
07 October 2005
The end result? You be the judge ;)
The first two pics (left and bottom), is for Zainal Abidin. Nature lover
This house (left) is for Vaneasa Mae, violinist who likes having parties but still prefers simple life and lots of privacy.
Below: corridor leading to the guest house. Pretty need, but a "contractor" was hired to get it done.
This house is a vacation house for Jacky Chan and his family of dunno how many hundreds. The design is supposedly inspired by dragons from both East and West.
House for Kenny G and his family of 4. The building is on stilts but supposedly to be not more than one storey high. Sliding door will be one of the main features of this house to allow better viewing of nature.
House for Elizabeth Hurley and her son. The only house design to be partially over lake for the best view.
House of a average Joe who is a pilot and his family of 3. Another unique house design with one floor only but with two different structure. Plus a beautifully made car porch.
This is one of the nicest model I have seen. For a Korean singer/dancer. Simple double storey with flat roof and a big balcony! hmm.. cool!
So, guess, which is mine? No price for winning.
p.s. I did not take picture for the house which was meant for Micheal Jordan. I was too sleepy at that time. :(
05 October 2005
Although less irritating compared to a mosquito, it is still a threat to my well being. So annoying it is that after many years of technological breakthrough in trying to zap or splat the fly, its cohorts still manage to find ways to buzz around just to get your attention.
Here are some of the methods I have used in my 20 years experience.
- simple hand clapping method: never got around to mastering it. The flies are usually faster than my brain can register. Neither could I bare the idea of touching a fly, dead or alive. So, the clapping method did not succeed.
- Fly swater: A very useful and cheap tool. Can get it at a local store for less than RM5. Although it works as fine as your hand, but the results it yields is way better as you can strike from a further distant. With this tool is which I had the most kill.
- Electrically-charged Fly swater: Technology upgrade. Rather silly idea because it still depends on your hand work, but fun more the less especially after the kill. I once used to catch semi-conscious flies and put it on this fly swater to see sparks. But that was only once, honest! (battries not included)
- Leg-stepping method: Not really practical, but still fun. Legs are not as agile as your hands. But the satisfaction of squishing flies with legs are higher than of the hand. How often do you get to brag about killing flies with your legs (without the killer smell of course)? Shoes and semi-concious flies required.
- Windscreen: Works if you are driving through summer time in Australia or place full of ermm.. waste. Yes, the windscreen is very useful especially when you are driving very fast. The flies (or any thing) that cannot fly away fast enough will be sucked into the windscreen. Not very beautiful, but it works.
- Knife: Yup, it works. Unless getting hungry while working late at night seriously affect my visual senses. This one happened when I was spreading peanut butter on my bread and a fly landed on it. Being sensible, I tried shaking it hoping it would fly, it did not. Fearing that the fly would turn at me for disturbing its meal, I quickly slam the bread shut and squash it using the knife. Hmm.. so much for supper. Maybe the killer weapon is the bread?
04 October 2005
I am about to start an epic journey to finish my presentation that is due in 10 hours and less. My brain tells me to finish my work, but I insisted on blogging.
It won't take long, this entry would be a short one. Just want to tell people who come by a few things about me just yet ;) and what I am feeling at the moment.
- Missing some people
- Mood slightly elevated
- A little hungry
- Somewhat sleepy
- Rather paranoid over a phone call
- Wanting a full meal with family
- Very blessed!
Jesus's loves us! blehehehehe...
26 September 2005
Nothing to be proud of. And I don't like showing off this capability of mine. Because, it causes chaos. It annoys people. It discourages people and losses trust and friendships.
Lately (again), I was told that I did not do my job. I have neglected my members. One feed back I got from one of my team mate was:
The change is not noticable. They feel like nothing has changed since being transfered. They felt leftout and coming for meetings is a drag. They rather be somewhere else. There is little or no follow-up. (Paraphrased)I would admit that I do not have much time in the world to call everyone up and inform of the up and coming. My nights have been greatly restricted to sitting at home and trying to get some work done. The day would be going to college or church to finish my other errants. At least I make an effort to go through my checklist at least once a week.
The person who made the comment above, by all means should be forgiven. He does not know what I have been through, neither do I know what he is going through too. But it hurts me and angers me. I am not planning to take out my baseball bat to threaten him (searches in background), hmmm can't seem to find it. Oh wait, I don't have one at all. Silly me, maybe I will use my feather then.
To be honest, I admit, I have showed off my skill for that person to see to some degree. But that did not mean I neglected him totally. The past few weeks, I have tried to call him out several times so we could run some errants and chat at the same time. Other times I have tried calling him out so we could catch up a little. I called and send him messeges asking his whereabout in which he did not reply.
When I do meet him, he is always busy or looking for someone else's company.
Indeed we have our own life. Indeed he has his right to his opinion. Well, my team mate told me that he might come and see me to discuss about this particular issue soon.
Might. A good choice of word. I await for that day to come. Might, is what I really need from God now when it does happen.
At the mean time, let Him minister to me.
22 September 2005
*Snort. Where were we? Ah, Politics. I have been visiting this website about Malaysian politics known as Screenshots. This website has won awards like the Blogs Defending Freedom of Expression.
But today, I want to tell you of something I read today from Screenshots that took me by surprise. A link lead me to a BBC interview of a Malaysian triad. Read it and so would you be surprise.
Now, go forth and learn... or read from different perspective.
I starting to get the hang of Malaysian politics, I think.
19 September 2005
- I am the black sheep of the family in terms of thinking. Everyone else (in this family) thinks pretty hard and pretty long.
- God works in pretty amazing way through the lifes of people.
- Shut up and it will do you good by listening.
- Although some people may be struggling with priorities in life, they are still willing to move for God.
- Someone and my brother said that God's presence should not be in our carreer, safety, food provision, wealth or health, but in EVERYTHING and EVERY PARTS of our life.
OK, time to go get some work done before bedtime. Please pray for us as a family. And oh, for Lor too as she is enjoying herself in Phillipines.
17 September 2005
- Burn the house
- Buy a new house and shift in. Leave all of your rubbish behind
- Have a junkayard sale
- Hire a contractor (i.e. your kids, your kids' friends, your kids' parents, your kids...) and pay him/her lavishly
- Have a camp fire, or threaten too (Not related to the first option)
- Organise a function.
The sane human of me decided to chose last option (without putting much thought into it, only to regret the decision until it was too late). My cell group decided to organise a BBQ for our non-Christian friends and finding the right place to organise the event proved to be much harder than organising th event it self.
After searching at several potential places was shot down (including one place with BBQ pit which cost RM200 and an apratment with one toilet down, no fan, termite infested floor, and leaking kitchen), my house was the only option. Without thinking about the psychological anguish that was to come after, I absent mindedly said yes. That was because my cell leader promised to help out too!
The front and back lawn is infested with wild growth (without proper care, grass can grow really really wild). It was like a tropical forest out there. After giving a quick trim, it became like the plains of Spain.
All the rest of the useful stuff (not rubbish in my sight) was shifted up stairs into different bedrooms or storeroom for sorting later. The floor was later wiped 3 times. Twice with clean water once with detergent (which I did not know it exist in my house).
So in the end, the whole house looked so much cleaner and lighter because all the rubbish (or not) has been hidden in a place out of sight.
The function went well... although the place was in serious mess after that. Cleanning was really necessary otherwise it would be infested with rats and cockroaches. But the best part was, in the dirty environment, people still managed to eat, mingle around, got to know each other, have fun and clean up all the spills that happened!
The people I met other than my cell group members came from all sorts of background. And the interesting fact was most of them studied in the same secondary school. So it seems like the akwardness was reduced. It is also amazing to see how people's life were intervined in a way, no matter how far you go, you are still connected to each other through one friend or another.
My cell group members, amazing, seriously amazing. I have never seen them worked together at such wonderful pace before. They responded, took initiative and even offered to help without asking! I was really blessed!
So in the end, when it all ended, I could see that the visitors (most of them) seemed like they enjoyed themselves.
In the end, when all things were cleared, wiping the floor in the deep silence of night, knowing that everything else has been cleared and the fact that God was helping me out throughout the whole event was just simply satisfying. Many things were simply going out of hand but yet He made it happened. And as a bonus, He gave me strength while cleaning the house even when it was nearly 1 in the morning! *chuckles.
Now, my house is very much cleaner than the many years before. For a limited time only, you can come visit my house with a small fee (food is exceptable). House is open 12 hours a day, call before you leave. It is either now or never!
Amazing... just amazing!
Note: Author is currently very proud of the clean house he is currently enjoying. Do contact him if more details is needed on how to clean your house!
14 September 2005
- It cost RM3 per day.
- The price remained the same the past 2 years or more.
- It now cost me RM7 a day compared to RM5 before the price hike.
- I get to sleep in the bus on the way back
- I get to read while waiting for the bus to come
- I get to meet people (or see) people, nice looking people while waiting for the bus to come. (some people would definitely protest to that)
One faithful day, my friend decided to attend the later class, leaving me alone at the bus stop. A bus came by and a lady got off the bus asking me for a if a certain bus has passed by. Telling her that I was waiting for the bus she mentioned, we started talking a little.
It went on for about until the bus arrived, until we reached our destination and until we parted our ways.
That was the end of it. Knowing that I might bump into her once in a blue moon.
The next day, the blue moon rose again. I bumped into the lady on the way back home from college with my traveling mate at the bus stop. A quick introduction later, the lady and I started talking. While my friend of mine, became absolutely quiet and look into the blank. We waited for the bus for almost an hour that day for the bus to come. The lady later mentioned that she has been waiting at least an hour before we arrived.
Like striking the lottery twice, the moon rose again on the third day and we met the lady again on the way back home. And immediately, she told us that she had been waiting at least an hour there. After a while, the lady convinced us to share a taxi back to home.
On the fourth day, my friend told me when we were leaving college that if we do bump into the lady, we will have to wait at least another hour before going home. As soon as we reached the bus stop, he quickly gave a quick scan of the area before letting of a sigh of relieve. When the bus finally arrived, I thought I heard him say "yippee". Well, it seems like the blue moon missed its cue.
All these meetings could be summed down to a few statements and a few questions. It is not that I am not glad to see her, I am afraid of seeing this lovely aunty! Don't get me wrong, she is a lovely lady and friendly. But there is this barrier of discomfort that bugs me, about our age barrier and her being a little too friendly. BUT, if she were to be 30 years younger, I would not mind. If she were to be a model, rich, smart, intelligent... well, you get the drift.
Hmm.. so what do you expect from all these encounters? Not much, we would be meeting more of her in future. Girls will protest to some of these, like Mythweaver. For understanding a little on why girls would do this, read this.
10 September 2005
Feeling happy and regaining her original level of confidence again, the car was ready to show her body and owner without much shame. The owner decided to take her out for a ride around town, and took her out for a simple meal (which cost the owner RM10).
At night, the owner decided to have his meal with his mates while she was left to hang out with the rest of her friends under the tree.
Not known to the owner, that was a decision he soon regretted.
When the owner returned to his car, she was covered with birds' wastes. Shocked and clearly deranged (do not know what the word means but let's give it a try), he quickly drove his baby home and gave it a good scrubbing again. Neighbours peered out of their windows at 1 in the morning to see some psychotic maniac washing car in the dark (this did not happened, it was added to make the parable more interesting).
Within a short moment, she became clean again and the owner is happy again. Of course, you cannot see how clean it is in the dark until the morning star shines again.
Moral of the story: Do not park your car under the tree. And was your car more often (what my mom keeps telling me).
p.s. This is the part where readers must go "Huh?"
08 September 2005
"OK, you don't sound like one."
Yes, I am a Chinese. And I can speak Chinese too. I love Chinese food. And I like Chinese New Year very much, thank you.
But people keep on asking me. Their reaction to the fact that I can speak Mandrin has buffled them more than the mystery behind the rising price of oil recently. It might not sound like the typical M'sian Mandarin accent, but it sure provides humour to those who are willing to listen and annoyance to those who can't take it.
I can speak the language and several other dialects like Seng ning (my dialect which sounds like Cantonese, but with a slight pronounciation), Cantonese and Hokkien. But the sad fact for me is, some of my friends would rather have an English speaking me than any other things. Reason? I occasionally speak like a piano that needs serious tuning.
Intonation while speaking Chinese (language or dialect) is crucial. Different intonation for the same sound gives totally different meaning. Wait a minute, even the same sound with the same intonation could represent different Chinese characters! There are 5 different intonations. So, with much practise and juggling, you can be a master too, young ones.
Now, that is where my problem began. Although I have nearly 9 years worth of Mandarin classes (not inclusive of several extra years in kidnergarten), I still have problems with intonations. English is my primary language and my parents has always emphasised on good English (Not that my English is any better, but we will save this for another day:).
People don't find it hard to understand me, they just can't stop wondering which wire needs tuning in my brain. And they can't stop laughing.
Recently, the question of me being Chinese enough has risen to a new level. A few weeks back, this questioned dealt a death blow to my ego: "are you even Chinese?" That, was much more hurtful than "are you a banana?".
Why? Because I did not know a supposedly famous Chinese ingredient in some soup. Hmmm.. It can't go any worst.
I was wrong. Later that day, another friend asked the same question *ouch! The irony was that guy could not speak Mandarin even though he is a Chinese. :P
All is not lost fortunately, there is a small consolation after all these episodes. A few days back, I was waiting for my bus to come. A lady walked by and asked me in Mandarin if the one bus she was looking for has passed by. Nothing unusual about that. But what made the day was when we continued conversing, she found out that I could speak English! The reason why she initiated the conversation in Mandarin was because I looked like I came from China.
Now, isn't that great?
07 September 2005
While I was not writing, I have been spending lots of hours in visiting blogs of my friends, blogs that I enjoy, and blogs of strangers. Each day, I spend nearly 2 hours (sometimes more) on reading blogs. ehehehe... I have my reasons. I am doing a research for my project.
What has that got to do with Architecture? Isn't your course all about buildings? Yes, it has everything to do with my course. You have to know that most buildings are meant for human beings. And human beings have different personalities and interest.
In our country, one of the most common buildings are terrace houses. Although the designs may vary from one area to another, it still a form of mass production in my point of view, leaving us with not many options.
My newest project in this new term is to create a house which suits the client's personality of our liking in a place so ulu (secluded in Malay, and it has a name. It is known as Ulu Yam). And I chose someone who flies aeroplanes. After searching high and low for a suitable profile through blogs and dating websites (I was really desperate), I finally found several potential clients that has enough information which informs me of their interests (other than their love for aeroplanes).
Of course, along the way, I found out several things that surprised me:
- There are websites of blog listing which specially caters to profession of the aviation industry.
- Dating websites want you to be a member before you can get any information about the person you are interested in.
- If you are not careful, you can venture in to blogs with connections to porn even within the profesion oriented websites.
- George Bush once had a blog.
- There are wars that goes on within the blogging community over blog comments (yeah, this is not part of the project. But I was bored of not finding anything interesting.)
Yes, pray for me to finish my homework ON TIME and WELL and bless others without thinking too much. Pray that God is with all that seeks Him earnestly. Pray for peace at heart for people suffering silently everyday. Amen.
God bless you :)
23 August 2005
I got to know my previous term's results and it was bad news. I did not hit the minimum required to continue receiving my scholarship. It is to my understanding that they (the college) are recalling it back and I will have to pay for studying now. All of these happened during a holiday I wanted to enjoy so much. Sadly, I did not enjoy too much of the time I had and now I am actually looking forward for the new term to term start. So I would have a chance to proof myself that I can do it.
Yup... but classes only start next week. And one week seems like a pretty long wait all of a sudden. *chuckles*, at least that leaves me with enough time to seek strength from God for the new term. I worry that I would fall back into the lazy self again, and I really hated it when that happened. Solution, find a good study partner or a torturer that would torment and remind me what I would be if I do not perform. :)
Ah, here is another case. It has been a long time since I have decided to stop having crushes on this particular girl I barely know. At the very beginning, I was too shy to talk to her. We only met a couple of times and greeted each other.
A good friend of mine told me to take courage and strike a conversation with her. Indeed, as chance allowed it, we talked about the weather and how each other were going home. And she said (paraphrased): "Oh, today my boyfriend is fetching me at 6." That was the beginning of a turning point. To put it crudely, she is off boundaries, a no-no.
Ironically, we met each other more often and at least we are having a friendship that is growing (I think) slowly.
A third example: Working in the event's department for is such a hastle and something very new to me. I would admit I was slacking in many aspect of my job and complained a lot. However, at least I was able to make decisions (I think, again) for the way things should go in my area. I got a friend to help me in the department and he has been the most helpful of all person.
After awhile, I got some wake up call not to neglect my responsibilities. I finally decided to actually do my job. However, I soon realised that my boss would rather inform my friend on going ons and updates rather than approach me. Decisions are made without my knowledge.
I had the biggest of mood swings the past few days and nights. One good example: Chatting online. I was happy talking to a friend in one chat window, and being serious and dissapointed at the next chat window. And the mood changed back and forth every time the chat window changed. Hmmm... man, I was as though I had the worst PMS. Now I know how it feels like to be left out. *sigh
What do you learn from all of these? It could be something about me, or human nature, or even as Christians who has a relationship with God. God is always calling and reaching out to us all the with such tender love and we turn away to love something else instead. Yet, we only seek Him when we need help from Him. Maybe what I felt is a small comparison of what He always feel. Pursuing vainly only to have it when we finally give up? And getting it not the way one expects it to be?
I do not know if people could see the relationship between this conclusion and the cases mentioned above. But that is how my brain is uniquely wired (it could mean either way). :)
p.s. Thanks Yew and Lor for the advise over chicken rice. Made me realised some important things. I would do my best in serving while being in the dept ;)
I just chat with my friend not too long ago about event we were involved. And she told me the reason why helped although it wasn't her responsibility (and department) was because I was actually blur. Many people seemed to agree on that fact that I work too slowly and always seemed confused. However, no one dared to tell me.
For whatever reason why no one told me, I do not know. But I am greatful to have a friend who was willing to speak the truth although there was a chance it could hurt my feelings. The fact that no one actually tells me hurts me more than what state I am in. *sigh... Thanks Chea :)
Another person who encouraged me in the most unusual way. What blessings.
21 August 2005
More than usual? My burger is related to a WC?
My other breakfast date.
Yup, sure brings back memories of an old game
How often do you see a dome which has gone for extreme diet?
Beautiful weather. Especially after the haze.
Gear with a sinking feeling..
Hanging clothes at the side of the field. A scene that is rare even at the place this was taken.
You like the pictures? You can ask it from me. :)
15 August 2005
When Eld. Be gave an alter call, I was one of the first one to be up there! In a way I am proud because I would usually wait for 23 people to go up first before seeing whether I am I want to go up or not.
I was glad mostly because I wanted God to help me. And the fact is only He can help me. I guess I always make the mistake of relying so much on myself more than on Him. Eld. Be quickly prayed over me, and through Char, He told me "Perfect love knows no fear".
Followed on was during hang-out time, A. Flor decided to get me a Christmas@Park T-shirt. Sounds pretty strange, because Christmas is in another 4 more months away. That, did not bother me because I am getting a new T-shirt!!
So, brilliant is a word to describe today. Blessed by God is the phrase to describe what I am feeling now. Thanks :)
p.s. Welcome to my blog! My visitor count has gone up to 2!! TWO!! dua! tu! ngo leh! liong gor!.. buahahha...
p.p.s. Oh, another blessing is, the Wee sis' leftover egg sandwiches! yumm....
One thing the haze reminds me off is the computer games with bad graphic cards. I used to play Need For Speed III on a lousy computer system. And a lousy computer system do not reproduce a scenery fast enough. So what you will see is when you are driving along, further down the road you will have things popping up towards you. And beyond that, it is shrouded with a blur "mist". Yes, it is like driving in the haze.
But the most amazing thing happened on thursday night when youth leaders (from church) met up for our weekly meeting. At the end of the meeting, our pastor prayed for haze to be lifted up, saying that it was scriptural. And it did work :) !!! When we left the meeting later, the sky was definitely clearer. And the next day, it was as though the haze was gone for good!
Yes, poor penang folks.
But one thing for sure, we believed in the power of God. And He made it happened. What blessings!
Now, pray for the people in the north who are suffering from the haze. So that the haze will stop coming back and paster anyone at all. Amen!
08 August 2005
- There are two parking fines I am dealing with one of them threatening a court case if I don't pay up soon
- there is a streamyx bill totalling more than RM 900 under my name because I did not cancel the account almost a year ago when it was giving me so much trouble.
- my scholarship is at threat if I do not get at least 2.85 an above this term because I did not meet the mark required last term
- there are a lot of things not settled for my part in an event I am involved with, and my "boss" is chasing me.
The fact that I could not stick to one kind of fasting makes me feel bad too. Now that I am on holiday, I am rather demotivated. What more when I go back to college with so much trouble in hand (in two weeks time).
There are happy times, short happy times. Especially when I am praising God. But mostly I am feeling a little crappy because of all the mess I made. All the other time I spend praying, asking God to give me strenght and not bless me specifically. And yet I have little faith. I fear that I would be dissapointed. What am I to do?
I want to tell someone about all my troubles and yet I can't find a suitable "victim". Some victims know some part of the story. The rest are all hidden within my heart, in which only God knows.
God is not a victim, not at all... eheheh... He has been faithful and forgiving and helpful. But, I felt like I have dissapointed Him so many times. At the moment, I just need someone who walk with me through all my problems. Some one I could be accountable to. Some one who would minister to me. Some one to hold me in the hand and lead me.
Hmmm... God... help... please...
28 July 2005
As for now, I am on holiday while the rest of the world just got back to work and studying. What about my college friends? Hmm.. here is the hard part. I am not that close to any of them. Sure, we can talk, but not close enough to meet them up during the holidays to actually talk. Most would be working part time (I want to too), while the rest would have gone back to their beloved hometown, a small portion are aquaitances in college.
Sigh.. what am I to do? TV is not a very good option mind you. There is only so many hours in a day to keep me entertain. And more so this month is fasting month. I have finally figured out what to fast for, now the thing is to get going.
Well, it is pretty late now. I am saying this when I am on holiday? Kind of silly isn't it? Anyway, more things to come. Good night and God bless!
30 June 2005
First stop was to visit all the walls and ceiling of my house
Soon, it got tired of my house and decided to find nature. Those are fake flowers coated with a layer of dust.
Finally decides to land on a package, waiting for the DHL guy to come along to collect it back to nature
The United Needle Alliance has once again sent another wave of its fighters to take over the household. Striking mostly in the cover of the dark, the alliance a.k.a. mosquitos flies covert mission to attack and distract all its victims from their daily task.
However, defenders of the fledging households are not cooperating enough to eliminate this attacks. Individuals are found using all imaginative methods like the fan, hand brute force in defending their lifeline from being sucked dry. Such methods have been proven succesful to some degree but it does not stop the mosquitos from giving up.
New technology are available but the house's defend budget could not afford such sophisticated defence mechanism. Although proven to be succesful in other household, the head of this household dismiss the idea and denied the proposal of getting such in-mosquitonane plus stating budget constrain as part of the reason.
Individuals of this house have no choice but to continue fighting alone.
Bad reporting by Xiong
27 June 2005
Another proof that I still do not know how to do my blog properlly. I need help and I wonder where I will find it? hhmmm...
Anyway, I am a resolver. Go check it out ;)
The egg and the mug. Interesting?
I actually thought this picture was interesting. With a little arrangement and setting the up the lighting effect, it came out pretty nicely!
This is another "proof" that I am trying hard to be a artisitic. Not very successful indeed. Hopefully people will find interest in the near future.
Well, I am still learning how to post pictures. There will be more to come. Stay tune...
25 June 2005
To be honest, I was so tempted to "accidentally" discover upon those articles and pictures but I have failed. Thank God! Being a Christian, this is one bad testimony and how dissapointing God would be on me. My conscious mind was fighting with my conscience every single second I was visiting the website.
Indeed I know what is right and wrong, and what makes it worst is that I went on with it. I wanted to test the "water" and see how deep I can go on without actually getting into it.
Sometimes I wonder how is it like to turn to God at times like these? He is with us all the time, but we push Him aside so we can have a it our way. And then we feel guilty and we start running back to Him.
Someone once told me that in this context, we are already guilty of sinning by the mere thought of it. (Mark 7:20 and 21 NLV - And then he added, "It is the thought-life that defiles you. 21For from within, out of a person's heart, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder..)
Could it be because we know that He forgave us that we do it? The more accurate question would be could it be because I knew that He forgives me all the time that I do it all the time? I do not know and yet I do not seek after Him.
If you were God, you would be frustrated too right? I would. Please forgive me Father. Pray for changes in me and take care of my heart, Lord.
p.s. Sarong Party Girl's website contains a range of topic and not only the fame sex and nudity as claim by local papers. Like the rest of humankind, the blogger faces real issues too.
p.p.s. Neither am I trying to sound "holier-than-thou" but that is what is on my mind and what God is telling me.
22 June 2005
- A phone call from a friend's friend.
- History class makes History.
- Feeling violated by a guy?
- BBQ in the mountains!
On a quiet Friday night after coming back from cell group, my hand phone rang at 2300hours. Seeing that it is an unknown number, I took all possible precautionary measures by:
- studying the number of the phone.
- press the answer button
- slowly put ear piece next to ear
- say "hello?"
After that call, I quickly evaluate my actions of the past 12 months before and after I met her to see if I have done anything that I could be guilty off. Thank goodness for being a "good boy", I slept soundly that night.
History class has set a new record. Including the history test, the total time of history class is 3 and a half hours! It is an amazing record indeed. This class also set the longest Saturday class time, from 9 to 5!
But my salute to my History teacher, Mr Rah. He has to endure two sessions of three and a half hours each with little break in between. That includes going down to take the extra set of test papers for us. Thanks sir!
Now I know how it feels like when a girl feels violated. I was in the line with my friends at the mamak (Indian Muslim) restaurant preparing to pay my bill at the counter. Since this is a shop I frequent, I know most of the friendly waiters there. A friendly pat on the shoulder was common.
But what happened was stunning. As I was about to pay, a waiter (one of the friendliest) came behind me and gave me a pat. A pat that quickly became a rub from the top of the shoulder to the area just above my butt. That gave me my second wakeup call of the morning. I quickly turn around and gave him a stunned look while saying the thing that is always at my tip of the tounge: Wwwhhheeeeeeeiiii!! At the same time, I could see my other guy classmate's stunned face too looking at me.
I quickly hand over my cash and was about to turn to leave when that waiter move forward and spoke closely into my ear (something which I could not make out). The distance was way, waaayyy, waaaaaaayyyyyyyyy beyond the comfort level of a guy to guy whisper. I sillily gave a silly smile and turned away, moving to the nearest female object I could find.
Trying to hint my girl friend that we NEEDED to move, I said something any surprised person would say ("wwoooooooowwwww") a little too loud. The next thing I know is that the waiter called me and waved at me, scaring me even more.
We continued to move on and my guy friend began relating to the girls what happened. That made me wonder, why don't I have a girl friend when I really need one.
The Moral of the story is:
- I will choose a girl over a guy at any time.
- I will have a girl next to me all the time everytime I enter that mamak again.
Conversation between me and an unknown 5 year old kid (I think he is that young) I met on the way home on Sunday after cobine church celebration in Wisma Angkasa.
Me: Did you do the butterfly? (A craft the children did in Sunday school)
Moral of the story: Kids know their lesson well on not talking to strangers...
To celebrate father's day, I have decided to follow both my parents to Karak for dinner in the hills. It was a spectacular place with a great view. The only thing was, with nature, you will have to deal with mosquitoes, flies, and many Unidentified Flying Insects.
Having a BBQ dinner there is a good idea. It was pot luck, everyone brought something that could be eaten. In the end, there were so much meat and so little carbohidrate that my nutriotionist friends would shake their head in disgust. However, the good news was that the fish we had were fresh and directly from the pond near by.
We could have had ducks too, but it would be too much hassle to chase, chop and clean.
The pictures of this place would be out soon. Till then, enjoy and be blessed!
Although they managed to bring him to a local hospital, he was barely alive. His family spent the last few minutes of his life beside him before the cocktail finally took its toll on his body.
According to his friends, he was a quiet person but who had ambitions just like everyone of us. However, due to a moment of which many cannot and never will comprehend, he made a decision he soon regretted but it was already too late.
My regards and sympathy towards his family and friends of which has gone through so much in this event. May they recover and move on in life quickly.
16 June 2005
- Monday morning meeting.
- Morning meeting
- Tuesday afternoon planning for event
- Skipped classes in the process but received the most exciting sms to date. (More details to come)
- Tea with church mates in A&W
- Drove Wil's Juara.
- Woke up at 1 to do homework.
- late morning meeting to review the previous day's plan.
- went in to class late.
- had dinner with Wah. He walked all the way to my house from Sunway. Don't you feel honoured? To show him my gratitude, I show him around my area, by foot.
- we settled for dinner with Wal and his bro.
- watched the most interesting CSI episode (Hint: burnt pregnant woman and murdered family)
- had supper with Kel to discuss about cell group
Discussion with Kel was interesting and deep. Since he is going to be cell leader, I will supporting him all the way. God have mercy on us! I also appreciate the time we had, thanks Kel!
I guess there will be more meeting in future regarding the event. The lecturers were IMPRESSED with our planning! OK, OK, the truth is, they LOOKED impressed. Either way, we are still getting off a good start. Do pray for us ok?
Some memorable conversation I had lately, not the exact words, but you get what I mean :)
- "Your house is unusually litted up," "Yeah, happens when I am not home" - in other words the house is dark when my friend is home.
- "The stars did not perform well that night" - a dissappointed someone who just came back from the jungle.
- "Nobody goes home until the plan is done" - Boss (committee coordinator) said on Tuesday
- "What kind of weird culture you all have. Shouldn't you call before going to someone house instead of calling in front of the gate?" - Wah when I called Wal at his house.
14 June 2005
Not only is there an event to worry about, my projects are due soon. So now I will have to find a balance pretty soon or I will not be able to continue writing nonsensical stuff anymore. But thank God!! I am more in a do-it-mood now. Less procrastinating then usual, but not much improvement in the amount of work done.
I am going to sleep pretty late tonight. Hopefully I won't crash my car tomorrow. Pray!!
Most memorable quotes these past few days, or something similar to that.
- We must do something to the cats. There are four piles of shit in the front yard! - says D upon coming home.
- Fill in the form, and maybe you can replace your car with the BMW X3 - the petrol pump attendant pointed at my old Ford when I pump in Mobil.
- Don't get him because you can, Jolene - a song by Dolly something, heard on BBC radio.
- Your eyes works like a camera (not a digital camera though) - Sunday Star, medical section on taking care of your eyes.
13 June 2005
What is it like to have all the opportunity in the world and still missed it? It feels like those forwards that we usually get about seizing every single opportunity before it is too late. But do they know about the emotional burden behind it? Do they know about how does it feel like or even the kind of situation one is in? Is it always as simple as saying it to the face?
What if the person is someone you do not know but a soul you see from far? Both barely know each other well enough other than the mere existence. Saying hello would only give temporary satisfaction but the desire to know about the person behind the face grows each time.
But how can one be attracted to someone you do not know? Is it mere physical attraction? Or is it even deeper than that? How would you explain to her that you are more than interested?
Is this a mere fantasy? Or is it a reality check? What if getting involved in such a way is against a person’s living principles? But isn’t life all about taking the right risk? Then, what is the “right” risk? What happens next if all things fail? Awkwardness will come every time we meet. Will that bring us back to square one? Or will it take us to a whole new level?
If only things were that simple... if only.
11 June 2005
With that being said, the directors proposed that the committee discuss about this matter hoping to weigh the pros and cons before proceeding. After the directors left the meeting room. The debate took a turn and things got worst. That departmental head who proposed the risky idea, fought very hard to promote the ideas, saying it is for the best of the event as all gains are divided to the other departments too. The coordinator said that it still has a lot of flaws. And at that moment, things got personal.
That departmental head started stating that she worked so hard to get it done, and she don't see it in the rest of us. And on and on and on she went. Most of the things she said, just cancelled all the praises we got from the directors. Thank goodness the secretary, although obvious that the damage was done, said that she should stop, before it becomes personal.
I felt a little out of place there and then. And I would love to defend my committee against such attack. No doubt that departmental head has the passion for doing her work, but it became personal for her when the idea was not well received (it would be RM10K or more over budget). I could not say much in that situation as I have not been attending meetings and played only a minor role till that day.
I was thinking of getting her to apologize to the committee as she just insulted all of them as they were not up to her standards. I do not know. I really don't.
On another hand, the evening was more pleasant. We had cell group at Yew's house for the first time in many moons. A good change of venue, a short and confusing but amusing ice-breaker we had, a two-song-praise and worship, and a livelier than usual discussion.
Today's word/discussion was about second chances we get when we accept Jesus, base on John3:1-21. In the end, the message was asking us to reach out to friends and family who are not saved.
Yik then shared a powerful testimony about how as Christians act can affect how non-Christians react. Classic case was when Yik talked to his good friend about Lor's trip to the orang asli, his friend, a Sikh, said that she has a place in heaven. And that was all because he noticed how Lor was willing to serve the Lord. Yik then said it was as though everything fell into place. And for the first time, Yik talked with his friend for 2 hours on the phone regarding God. A thing that never happened before. It was as though the Holy Spirit set everything to happen the way it was.
Cell ended before 11. After that, people set around to hang out before going off. Tadaa.. interesting turn of events, once again.
Most memorable quote the past 2 days, again, not the exact words, but still you will get the gist.
- What? Most guys would jump on their girlfriend every chance they have! - Al said to me when she found out what I never made out with any of my ex-es.
- They have toilet there? - when some cell members found out from Wah when he came back from orang asli trip.
- Oh, it is wild fruits in Kenya - Wah again about durians
10 June 2005
In the morning, just before I was about to go pick my friend as I promised. I finally gave up and went searching for the spare key. As I left the house, I told God: Hey, help me! I need the key because I promised to fetch people like Son. I am desperate.
I continued to walk slowly to my car, shaking my poor head in vain. I scanned the road one more last time before getting into the car. And there it was! About 4metres from my car! It laid there waiting for me to pick it up.
There are only two explanation to situation.
- The key was there all this while, and I missed it every time I searched for it.
- The key was taken by a bird and went on a round trip. Only to be taken back by God and waiting for me to pick it up again.
And the sad thing was that I did not rely on God through out the whole search. But at the very moment I decided to ask God for help, it tadaaa!!! Interesting eh? I could not thank God enough!
That is all for now. That is the highlight of the day. The other one was that I did not go to the FIR concert in Sunway Pyramid.
Here, signing off once again.
Go and be blessed!
Prayer: For people who are still taking exams, for D, for the people who just came back from the mission's trip (thank you God!), and for my friends and family who are not feeling happy about the world. Take care of them God! Amen.