26 September 2005

Neglect (PhD.)

Neglect, something which I master well. I was borned with it. I use it all the time. But of late, I tried concealing my amazing capability due to responsibilities. It reveals itself subtly once in a while. And people could see it well.

Nothing to be proud of. And I don't like showing off this capability of mine. Because, it causes chaos. It annoys people. It discourages people and losses trust and friendships.

Lately (again), I was told that I did not do my job. I have neglected my members. One feed back I got from one of my team mate was:
The change is not noticable. They feel like nothing has changed since being transfered. They felt leftout and coming for meetings is a drag. They rather be somewhere else. There is little or no follow-up. (Paraphrased)
I would admit that I do not have much time in the world to call everyone up and inform of the up and coming. My nights have been greatly restricted to sitting at home and trying to get some work done. The day would be going to college or church to finish my other errants. At least I make an effort to go through my checklist at least once a week.

The person who made the comment above, by all means should be forgiven. He does not know what I have been through, neither do I know what he is going through too. But it hurts me and angers me. I am not planning to take out my baseball bat to threaten him (searches in background), hmmm can't seem to find it. Oh wait, I don't have one at all. Silly me, maybe I will use my feather then.

To be honest, I admit, I have showed off my skill for that person to see to some degree. But that did not mean I neglected him totally. The past few weeks, I have tried to call him out several times so we could run some errants and chat at the same time. Other times I have tried calling him out so we could catch up a little. I called and send him messeges asking his whereabout in which he did not reply.

When I do meet him, he is always busy or looking for someone else's company.

Indeed we have our own life. Indeed he has his right to his opinion. Well, my team mate told me that he might come and see me to discuss about this particular issue soon.

Might. A good choice of word. I await for that day to come. Might, is what I really need from God now when it does happen.

At the mean time, let Him minister to me.

22 September 2005


Currently, there are many things in my mind I want to write about. However, I have decided that politics should be more interestzeze.z.zz...z.....

*Snort. Where were we? Ah, Politics. I have been visiting this website about Malaysian politics known as Screenshots. This website has won awards like the Blogs Defending Freedom of Expression.

But today, I want to tell you of something I read today from Screenshots that took me by surprise. A link lead me to a BBC interview of a Malaysian triad. Read it and so would you be surprise.

Now, go forth and learn... or read from different perspective.

I starting to get the hang of Malaysian politics, I think.

19 September 2005


It is half quarter past two in the morning and I just concluded a discussion with my brother on life issues and perspective. For once, I have been paying at least 50% to what he said and tried to shut up most of the time. A few things I learnt through this discussion:
  • I am the black sheep of the family in terms of thinking. Everyone else (in this family) thinks pretty hard and pretty long.
  • God works in pretty amazing way through the lifes of people.
  • Shut up and it will do you good by listening.
  • Although some people may be struggling with priorities in life, they are still willing to move for God.
  • Someone and my brother said that God's presence should not be in our carreer, safety, food provision, wealth or health, but in EVERYTHING and EVERY PARTS of our life.
Amazing. Simply amazing! Although I think I still have less issues in my life compared to my siblings, they serve God because He was there, is there, and will be there, to see them walk through the dark valleys into the light even if they know or not. Amazing!

OK, time to go get some work done before bedtime. Please pray for us as a family. And oh, for Lor too as she is enjoying herself in Phillipines.


17 September 2005

How to clean your house

Do you have problems keeping your house clean? Finding it hard to maintain the house of your dreams (or not)? Here, are some tips on how to get around the magezines, books, cups and etc away from cluttering in the dining hall, living room and the floor! (Warning! Some of the following tips would require substantial amount of metal preparation.)
  • Burn the house
  • Buy a new house and shift in. Leave all of your rubbish behind
  • Have a junkayard sale
  • Hire a contractor (i.e. your kids, your kids' friends, your kids' parents, your kids...) and pay him/her lavishly
  • Have a camp fire, or threaten too (Not related to the first option)
  • Organise a function.
Before choosing any of the option above, the most important thing you must remember is that you want a house to stay at the end of the clearing up. Unless after all the years of cluttering, your rubbish has organically bond with the house, or it has become too toxic to be safely remove it.

The sane human of me decided to chose last option (without putting much thought into it, only to regret the decision until it was too late). My cell group decided to organise a BBQ for our non-Christian friends and finding the right place to organise the event proved to be much harder than organising th event it self.

After searching at several potential places was shot down (including one place with BBQ pit which cost RM200 and an apratment with one toilet down, no fan, termite infested floor, and leaking kitchen), my house was the only option. Without thinking about the psychological anguish that was to come after, I absent mindedly said yes. That was because my cell leader promised to help out too!

The front and back lawn is infested with wild growth (without proper care, grass can grow really really wild). It was like a tropical forest out there. After giving a quick trim, it became like the plains of Spain.

All the rest of the useful stuff (not rubbish in my sight) was shifted up stairs into different bedrooms or storeroom for sorting later. The floor was later wiped 3 times. Twice with clean water once with detergent (which I did not know it exist in my house).

So in the end, the whole house looked so much cleaner and lighter because all the rubbish (or not) has been hidden in a place out of sight.


The function went well... although the place was in serious mess after that. Cleanning was really necessary otherwise it would be infested with rats and cockroaches. But the best part was, in the dirty environment, people still managed to eat, mingle around, got to know each other, have fun and clean up all the spills that happened!

The people I met other than my cell group members came from all sorts of background. And the interesting fact was most of them studied in the same secondary school. So it seems like the akwardness was reduced. It is also amazing to see how people's life were intervined in a way, no matter how far you go, you are still connected to each other through one friend or another.

My cell group members, amazing, seriously amazing. I have never seen them worked together at such wonderful pace before. They responded, took initiative and even offered to help without asking! I was really blessed!

So in the end, when it all ended, I could see that the visitors (most of them) seemed like they enjoyed themselves.


In the end, when all things were cleared, wiping the floor in the deep silence of night, knowing that everything else has been cleared and the fact that God was helping me out throughout the whole event was just simply satisfying. Many things were simply going out of hand but yet He made it happened. And as a bonus, He gave me strength while cleaning the house even when it was nearly 1 in the morning! *chuckles.

Now, my house is very much cleaner than the many years before. For a limited time only, you can come visit my house with a small fee (food is exceptable). House is open 12 hours a day, call before you leave. It is either now or never!

Amazing... just amazing!

Note: Author is currently very proud of the clean house he is currently enjoying. Do contact him if more details is needed on how to clean your house!

14 September 2005

Bus stop meeting?

I have been involved with the local public transportation sector these past few weeks. Due to rising cost in traveling by car (blame petrol, it cost me RM63 to pump a full tank when it was nearly RM55 the last time!) traveling to college by bus is the cheapest option. The reasons:
  1. It cost RM3 per day.
  2. The price remained the same the past 2 years or more.
  3. It now cost me RM7 a day compared to RM5 before the price hike.
  4. I get to sleep in the bus on the way back
  5. I get to read while waiting for the bus to come
  6. I get to meet people (or see) people, nice looking people while waiting for the bus to come. (some people would definitely protest to that)
Now, I usually see people instead of meeting people there. My traveling companion, also my classmate, does much more seeing than I do. And when there is something good to see, my friend will distract me from my book to see the nice looking people. To be honest, I am usually too shy to look myself. You seriously have to believe me!

One faithful day, my friend decided to attend the later class, leaving me alone at the bus stop. A bus came by and a lady got off the bus asking me for a if a certain bus has passed by. Telling her that I was waiting for the bus she mentioned, we started talking a little.

It went on for about until the bus arrived, until we reached our destination and until we parted our ways.

That was the end of it. Knowing that I might bump into her once in a blue moon.

The next day, the blue moon rose again. I bumped into the lady on the way back home from college with my traveling mate at the bus stop. A quick introduction later, the lady and I started talking. While my friend of mine, became absolutely quiet and look into the blank. We waited for the bus for almost an hour that day for the bus to come. The lady later mentioned that she has been waiting at least an hour before we arrived.

Like striking the lottery twice, the moon rose again on the third day and we met the lady again on the way back home. And immediately, she told us that she had been waiting at least an hour there. After a while, the lady convinced us to share a taxi back to home.

On the fourth day, my friend told me when we were leaving college that if we do bump into the lady, we will have to wait at least another hour before going home. As soon as we reached the bus stop, he quickly gave a quick scan of the area before letting of a sigh of relieve. When the bus finally arrived, I thought I heard him say "yippee". Well, it seems like the blue moon missed its cue.

All these meetings could be summed down to a few statements and a few questions. It is not that I am not glad to see her, I am afraid of seeing this lovely aunty! Don't get me wrong, she is a lovely lady and friendly. But there is this barrier of discomfort that bugs me, about our age barrier and her being a little too friendly. BUT, if she were to be 30 years younger, I would not mind. If she were to be a model, rich, smart, intelligent... well, you get the drift.

Hmm.. so what do you expect from all these encounters? Not much, we would be meeting more of her in future. Girls will protest to some of these, like Mythweaver. For understanding a little on why girls would do this, read this.


10 September 2005

Parable of the bird droppings

The owner loveed his car very much but never took good care of it. Finally, after months of neglect and layers of dusts later, the owner decided to give his car a good scrubing. Giving the car something of which it deserves every month at least. Within one hour of starting, the accumulation of dirt on the car's interior and exterior has been reduced by a factor of 10 the power of 42. Much dish washing detergent and water were sacrificed in the process.

Feeling happy and regaining her original level of confidence again, the car was ready to show her body and owner without much shame. The owner decided to take her out for a ride around town, and took her out for a simple meal (which cost the owner RM10).

At night, the owner decided to have his meal with his mates while she was left to hang out with the rest of her friends under the tree.

Not known to the owner, that was a decision he soon regretted.

When the owner returned to his car, she was covered with birds' wastes. Shocked and clearly deranged (do not know what the word means but let's give it a try), he quickly drove his baby home and gave it a good scrubbing again. Neighbours peered out of their windows at 1 in the morning to see some psychotic maniac washing car in the dark (this did not happened, it was added to make the parable more interesting).

Within a short moment, she became clean again and the owner is happy again. Of course, you cannot see how clean it is in the dark until the morning star shines again.


Moral of the story: Do not park your car under the tree. And was your car more often (what my mom keeps telling me).

p.s. This is the part where readers must go "Huh?"

08 September 2005


"Are you really Chinese?"
"OK, you don't sound like one."

Yes, I am a Chinese. And I can speak Chinese too. I love Chinese food. And I like Chinese New Year very much, thank you.

But people keep on asking me. Their reaction to the fact that I can speak Mandrin has buffled them more than the mystery behind the rising price of oil recently. It might not sound like the typical M'sian Mandarin accent, but it sure provides humour to those who are willing to listen and annoyance to those who can't take it.

I can speak the language and several other dialects like Seng ning (my dialect which sounds like Cantonese, but with a slight pronounciation), Cantonese and Hokkien. But the sad fact for me is, some of my friends would rather have an English speaking me than any other things. Reason? I occasionally speak like a piano that needs serious tuning.

Intonation while speaking Chinese (language or dialect) is crucial. Different intonation for the same sound gives totally different meaning. Wait a minute, even the same sound with the same intonation could represent different Chinese characters! There are 5 different intonations. So, with much practise and juggling, you can be a master too, young ones.

Now, that is where my problem began. Although I have nearly 9 years worth of Mandarin classes (not inclusive of several extra years in kidnergarten), I still have problems with intonations. English is my primary language and my parents has always emphasised on good English (Not that my English is any better, but we will save this for another day:).

People don't find it hard to understand me, they just can't stop wondering which wire needs tuning in my brain. And they can't stop laughing.

Recently, the question of me being Chinese enough has risen to a new level. A few weeks back, this questioned dealt a death blow to my ego: "are you even Chinese?" That, was much more hurtful than "are you a banana?".

Why? Because I did not know a supposedly famous Chinese ingredient in some soup. Hmmm.. It can't go any worst.

I was wrong. Later that day, another friend asked the same question *ouch! The irony was that guy could not speak Mandarin even though he is a Chinese. :P

All is not lost fortunately, there is a small consolation after all these episodes. A few days back, I was waiting for my bus to come. A lady walked by and asked me in Mandarin if the one bus she was looking for has passed by. Nothing unusual about that. But what made the day was when we continued conversing, she found out that I could speak English! The reason why she initiated the conversation in Mandarin was because I looked like I came from China.

Now, isn't that great?

07 September 2005


Yup, something which I do not have the past few days for writing my in. It has been several weeks now since my last entry (well, it seems like weeks to me :).

While I was not writing, I have been spending lots of hours in visiting blogs of my friends, blogs that I enjoy, and blogs of strangers. Each day, I spend nearly 2 hours (sometimes more) on reading blogs. ehehehe... I have my reasons. I am doing a research for my project.

What has that got to do with Architecture? Isn't your course all about buildings? Yes, it has everything to do with my course. You have to know that most buildings are meant for human beings. And human beings have different personalities and interest.

In our country, one of the most common buildings are terrace houses. Although the designs may vary from one area to another, it still a form of mass production in my point of view, leaving us with not many options.

My newest project in this new term is to create a house which suits the client's personality of our liking in a place so ulu (secluded in Malay, and it has a name. It is known as Ulu Yam). And I chose someone who flies aeroplanes. After searching high and low for a suitable profile through blogs and dating websites (I was really desperate), I finally found several potential clients that has enough information which informs me of their interests (other than their love for aeroplanes).

Of course, along the way, I found out several things that surprised me:
  • There are websites of blog listing which specially caters to profession of the aviation industry.
  • Dating websites want you to be a member before you can get any information about the person you are interested in.
  • If you are not careful, you can venture in to blogs with connections to porn even within the profesion oriented websites.
  • George Bush once had a blog.
  • There are wars that goes on within the blogging community over blog comments (yeah, this is not part of the project. But I was bored of not finding anything interesting.)
Now that I have finally and officially concluded my research of my client's profile. I finally took time to write in. Well, I do not know when I will find my next round of inspiration to write again.


Yes, pray for me to finish my homework ON TIME and WELL and bless others without thinking too much. Pray that God is with all that seeks Him earnestly. Pray for peace at heart for people suffering silently everyday. Amen.

God bless you :)